How a voice from beyond pulled me back from the edge
People often ask how I became a wedding photographer. Mine isn’t the usual “born with a camera in my hand” story.
Back then, I was working as a graphic designer. I was in a dark place. Someone once asked if I could see the light at the end of the tunnel. But the truth is, I never saw any light. It was always just a dark tunnel with no end.
It all got too much. I was tired of this world—of carrying so much and never seeing a way out. I went to the beach, fully prepared to take my last breath. I’d completely given up and thought my story was about to end.
Now, I don’t believe in ghosts—but in that moment, standing on the beach, something happened. I felt a hand on my right shoulder. And in my mind—without sound, without words spoken out loud—I just knew the message “You are going to be all right”
I said out loud, “Granny, is that you? I don’t believe it—prove it!” And right then, lashing rain poured down on me from nowhere.
“It all got too much, and I was ready to end it all. I went to the beach, prepared to breathe my last breath. I’d completely give up, and was ready for the end of my story to come.”
Again, I felt the hand on my shoulder. Again, that same knowing message came: “You are going to be all right”. I asked again, for some sort of sign.
About a mile out over the sea, a small cloud broke apart and a single ray of sunshine lit up the water. My jaw dropped. I thought, “It’s not going to reach me.” But it did. The light moved over and stopped directly above me. A third time, I felt the hand on my shoulder, and once more came the same deep feeling “You are going to be all right”. I burst into tears. I felt one last touch—and the heavy weight I’d been carrying for years just lifted.
I went home and slept for a full day and night.
The next morning, that feeling hadn’t left me. It was like something bigger was guiding me. I felt a pull to take the bus into Dublin City. I didn’t question it. When I got there, I had this strange urge to take out all my money from the ATM. Then I walked straight into a camera shop. I knew nothing about cameras—but that gut feeling hadn’t let me down so far. I bought a camera, a lens, and a flash.
As I left the shop, something nudged me to head around the corner. I wasn’t sure why, but I followed the feeling. Just a few steps away, I turned the corner—and there it was: the Job Centre. Nothing special—except there was a poster in the window: “Photography course at Roslyn Park College”—the very same place where I’d studied graphic design. They had one place left. It felt like it was meant to be.
I went in, got an interview, and was accepted.
A few weeks later, a family friend asked if I’d photograph her wedding. I thought, “Is this the light at the end of the tunnel I could never see before?” I think it might’ve been.
“I no longer feel the heavy weight that was bringing me down. That day changed my life.”
I haven’t felt my granny’s presence again since that day. But I also haven’t felt the weight that used to drag me down. That day on the beach changed my life. To remind me where I came from and to stay grounded, my granny’s name is hidden in my logo.
Sometimes I think back to that moment and feel so incredibly lucky to still be here. I’ve now got a wonderful family—my wife Claire and our son Aaron, who I love so much. And I know in my heart that “I will be all right”.
The Turning Point That Saved Me
The weight was heavy, the world so still,
A quiet voice spoke, against my will.
Lost in a place where light couldn’t shine,
I thought the end would soon be mine.
But in that silence, a hand reached near,
"You’re going to be alright," it whispered clear.
The darkness lifted, the light found its way,
And I chose to stay, come what may.
Each step forward, my heart did heal,
A new beginning, a chance to feel.
The journey changed, from night to light,
And I found hope in the quiet of the fight.